My mother, Oneta Ann Sheridan Brown, died in her sleep on October 17th, 2025. She was living at The Villa at Blue Ridge Nursing Home in Columbia, MO.
Mom was born on November 9th, 1940, in a barn, on a farm, near the town of Vandalia, MO. I took a few liberties with the truth in that last sentence. I do not think Mom would mind. She did have a sense of humor. I often heard her laughing while she whooped my ass. She could swing a mean crutch.
She is survived by her sons, Kevin and Keith Brown, and her younger brother, Jimmie Sheridan. Grandchildren Erin, Justin, and Amy. Great-grandchildren: Camden, Adalie, and Reed. Of course, Kevin was her favorite son. (Guess who is writing this.)
She was preceded in death by her parents, Albert and Liz (Elizabeth) Sheridan. I knew them by their alias: Grandpa and Grandma.
Her older brother, J.W., and younger brother, Billy Bob, have also passed. They both passed away too young.
During visits with Mom over the past few years, I have tried to learn more about her childhood. I did not learn enough. We always feel we will have more time.
I did learn that her grandfather and uncle operated a moonshine still during Prohibition. She told me about her uncle going to federal prison during Prohibition due to his extracurricular spirit activities. He never ratted on her grandpa. I will tell that story one day. Sheridan outlaw blood.
I do want to talk about Mom’s early years. These years tell of her fight for life and a never-give-up attitude. Mom was a strong woman.
When she was seven years old, she walked into the kitchen and fell to the floor. She would never walk again. She saw doctor after doctor before she was finally diagnosed with polio. She lost the use of both legs. She wore braces and walked on crutches much of the rest of her life.
Doctors said that she would not live for more than a few years. She died one month short of 85. They said that she would never have kids. She had two sons. She was told that she would never drive a car. She learned to drive in her 20s. She was told over and over again that she could not do this or that. She proved them wrong.
The years on crutches took a toll, and she needed multiple shoulder surgeries. She finally had to move into a wheelchair. Not just any chair, but a turbocharged chair. One that moved so fast that they had to put a governor on it so that she would not run over people in the halls of the nursing home. Natural selection, she called it.
She did not like the nursing home, but who does? One day, an administrator contacted me to let me know that Mom and one of her friends had left. I found out that Mom had driven that turbocharged chair some distance down the street to eat at a restaurant. She was always complaining about the food at what she called the joint. They also happened to stop at a liquor store on the way back and made a purchase. The evidence was located in her mini fridge. Busted. Life in the joint. Sheridan outlaw blood.
Per Mom’s wishes, there will be no service. On the 25th, the family will gather at the City of Laddonia Cemetery, where Mom will be buried next to her mom and dad.
If you knew my mom, I ask you to go to your mini fridge on Saturday at 2:00 PM and grab a spirit of your choice. Pour a little out, and relive a memory. She would like that.
(This was posted on Facebook two weeks ago. I add it here so that those not on facebook might find it.)
Fierce’s seventy-six-year-old grandmother passed in 2022 from cancer. She did not tell anyone that she had cancer, and she did not receive any treatments. One day, she checked herself into a hospital, and that is how the family found out about her cancer. A week later, she was gone.
Fierce believes that his grandmother did not tell anyone about her disease because she wanted to be in control. She did not want to do treatments, and she did not want anyone hassling her.
Fierce understood why she did what she did. He did not like it, but he understood the reasoning behind it. He just wished he had a little more time to say goodbye.
I understand his grandmother’s thinking. I have often thought that if I make it into my mid-seventies, it would be time to re-evaluate whether or not I should continue treatments.
I had an appointment with my new oncologist a week or two ago. Time flies. He was trying to gently pave the way for his future, and probably very soon advice that I go on permanent treatments for as long as they worked instead of the intermittent therapies I had been using for years.
When I saw the doctor, we were still waiting for my most recent PSA results. He was waiting for those results to give his recommendation.
I told the doctor that I was tired of all the tests, the surgeries, the radiation, and all the pills.
He told me that it was better than the alternative.
Camden, I would like to talk about Valentine’s Day with you. I know it was last week, but we can still discuss it. You can later share the info with Adalie and Reed. I know you made Valentine’s for your friends and your mom and dad. Adalie probably did as well. Reed probably did not. Unless you or Adalie helped him. I do bet he did eat his share of candy. Speaking of candy, save me a little. You know how Papa loves his chocolate.
Why do I want to talk about Valentine’s Day? That I am not sure. I thought it was a good idea until I started writing. Then, I decided that I could use some help with this project. Maybe I could ask others about Valentine’s Day and share their thoughts. I think that sounds like a good idea. A group project.
First, I will tell you about the history of Valentine’s Day. I watched it on the History Channel. Here we go.
Ever since Hallmark, the Roman God of Cards, came out of the sky with little man Cupid on February 14, who knows what year? We celebrate this day with candy, cards, flowers, and Viagra. History Channel, I tell you.
Valentine’s Day is a day of romance for some. A day to forget for others. Galentine’s Day is the day before Valentine’s Day. I hope it becomes more popular. It is a day to celebrate platonic relationships and especially for women of all ages to spend time with friends.
Camden and Reed, we need to devise a day for us guys. A bro day. What could we call it…Menentine Day? Not very catchy. Broentine Day? No, I do not like that one either. Hell, let’s just stick to Monday Night Football. Throw me that bottle opener, please. My manly hands are having a tough time with this twist off top.
So the day before Valentine’s, I went out into the world and bought a few roses. Gaga got a dozen. I shared thirteen roses with old and new friends. I asked each person for their thoughts on love. We had some great conversations. Let me introduce you to my friends and share their insights.
Diane
This is my new friend Diane. We met in the parking lot of the store where I bought flowers. She was parked a few spots from me. This would be an excellent chance, I thought, to ask if she would like to help with my project. She said that she would. We took a photo and had a conversation.
Diane’s first husband of forty years died thirteen years ago. If I understood correctly, she and her second husband have been together for nine years as of last week. Diane told me that love never leaves you and love never ends.
When I told Diane that I was going to write something up for my littles about Valentine’s Day, she told me that one of her favorite childhood memories was making Valentine’s boxes for her friends. One year, she made a box for her ill teacher. She and her mother took the box to the teacher. That was love. Diane said that love takes all forms. Love is friends, family, church, and the earth.
Diane told me that you know you are in love when you get a warm and exciting feeling when you see the person you love, no matter how long you have known them. I enjoyed our visit.
After leaving Diane, I went downtown.
I noticed a woman sitting at a sidewalk table finishing her lunch. I walked up, sat down, and started a conversation. Amanda agreed to take a photo and talk about Valentine’s Day.
Amanda
Amanda considers Valentine’s Day as more of a Hallmark day. She has never had a relationship where she has felt loved. She feels that more men go onto dating sites and no longer interact like “old school guys.” She feels that at thirty-three, she may never have that special relationship. I told her that she had plenty of time. Thirty-three is nothing. She was happy to hear that. I hope Amanda one day finds love.
After visiting with Amanda, I drove over to the building where I used to work. I might find a few friends who would like a rose.
My first stop once in the building was Becky’s office.
Becky
Becky told me that if you loved someone, you were there for them. You took care of them. Becky added that you should not kill them. Even if, at times, that is what you wanted to do. I did not ask her where the bodies were buried.
I then went upstairs to see my good friend Tammy.
Tammy
Tammy told me that love was the feeling you get when you look at your children and grandchildren and know you would die for them.
Tammy added that her answer about love comes from a single person. She was unsure she would ever feel romantic love again unless it was with Travis Kelce. Tammy does not want to be the reason for Travis and Taylor’s breakup. She does not want to piss Taylor off or cause more teardrops on her guitar.
(I am a Swiftie)
Now, if the remaining pictures look like they were taken in the same room, they were. I was on assignment in Tammy’s office.
Maddie
Maddie said that love was putting someone else’s needs before your own and enjoying that. She felt that you know you are in love when you want to do life with them.
Val
Twenty-two-year-old Val told me that love is having someone who will wake up in the middle of the night to take care of you when you are sick…after a night of drinking.
Good job L.J.! L.J. is Val’s boyfriend.
Sarah
Love is what we all need in life.
Love is hard.
It is not flowers and rainbows all the time. Sometimes, you have to pick to love someone even when you do not want to; when you do that, it makes you love them so much more. Stay through the parts you do not love, but say I will love them anyway. When you are really committed to someone, and there is that deep-down love, you will go through the ups and downs. You will give up on them if it is just an on-the-surface love.
Jennifer
Love is wanting better for someone else than you have for yourself. Jennifer feels you know you are in love when you can’t picture life without them.
Julie
Love is when you can be yourself and feel content. You know everything will be great with this person, and you can handle anything together.
Ashton
Love is feelings and actions. Actions would be how you treat other people and how you treat yourself. Self-love. Sometimes, love is being tough with others. Tough love. Doing and saying what is right. Ashton shared that she is dating a meteorologist. I asked if he predicted rain when his leg twitched. She said he shakes his magic eight ball.
Naomi
Love is being safe. Love allows you to be yourself. You do not have to put on a mask. I threw in another question and asked Naomi if she believed in love at first sight. She said that she did not. She met her husband when he was fourteen. They went to high school together. She thought he was a dorky-looking kid. Namoi said that as you mature, your criteria for love matures. It’s not all fun and games. It’s not all about what you do together. It is who you are together.
Dalena
Different types and stages of love. When you find out you are pregnant, it is instant love, and that love is stronger than anything.
Met her husband at age sixteen. Over the years, their relationship has changed. Going through peaks and valleys over the years. It has now evolved into a stronger relationship than they had initially. How they love each other today differs from how they loved each other during the early years of marriage. Learning and growing together over the years. Dalena and Felix celebrated their twenty-second anniversary this past week.
Lexi
Love is being so comfortable with someone that you can truly be yourself.
The love you share with your partner and your love for your children is different. The love you have for your children is unconditional. The love for your partner, well, that love is very “fucking conditional.”
Well, Camden, Adalie, and Reed, I hope you will someday enjoy going back and reading these thoughts shared with you by my friends who know something about Valentine’s Day and Love. We had great conversations.
I think of my conversation with Diane and agree that love can hit you anytime and at any age. Love never ends. Love for your family, friends, neighbors, and the earth differs from romantic love. But it is still love.
Love others by showing them respect and empathy. A kind word, smile, and gesture go a long way. It has been said that people often do not remember what you said, but they will remember how you made them feel. Be interested in others.
Love can hurt. It can hurt a lot. The loss of someone close to you. A person or pet. Remember, no one is promised tomorrow. Every chance you get, remind someone that you love them. Romantic love can also hurt. Give it all you have.
I love each of you very much. I see your mom, aunt, and uncle in each of you. It is like loving them all over again.
After Adalie’s birthday party today, Gaga and I will leave for a trip south of the border. A resort in Mexico.
When we return, I will begin radiation treatments for that BAT they found in my head. Oh, I am sorry you are probably not familiar with medical jargon. That is okay; ladies at the CyberKnife center were also unaware of BAT. I was surprised. I educated them.
Big Ass Tumor…that is BAT. They have found a Big Ass Tumor in my head. Damn! Damn!! Damn!!!
It is not good. We shall see how this shakes out. 😊
Dear Camden 